Tattoo are only for criminals
Tattoo artist: what you want? Girl: just combine all stereotypical white girl tattoos into one Tattoo artist: say no more boredpanda.com

Strange ads
Starving African children. People filming for the UNICEF adverts:

Beer is love
WIFE:

Retarded units
HOW EUROPEANS MEASURE PEOPLE BIGSTU BIG BIGSTOCK BIG HOW AMERICANS MEASURE PEOPLE

Placebo
Me:

The points were strange
Any other houses: *wins* Dumbledore: Harry made his bed today. And for that reason, 100000 points to Gryfindore

Alabama
Me: Mom why do I only have one set of grandparents Mom: Ur dad and I married each other to keep our family's bloodline pure Me: PICTOPHIE

Nice!
My phone: The alarm clock will ring in 3 hours 48 minutes Me at 3 a.m.: imgflip.com

Earth is flat?
IF EARTH ISN'T FLAT Why are cars like this : And not like this?

Who else?
I.... just.. wanna.. graduate....